Gosh, it's so so tiring to go through days where everything seemed to fall apart. Not only it pierces through the heart and mind, but the soul as well. Feels as though i'm loosing my mind in the wildnerness. Brings me to that secret place where I longed to be rescued, to be comforted and encouraged, to surrender in the things that I cannot pursue any longer. When you have so many things rushing through your head and you're all over the place, I often wondered...'How do I go about finding rest?' I was reading about this particular passage on rest, a week ago in The Sacred Romance and later found myself being at the same situation as the author himself where 'My comforter', my abiding place was somewhere else. I have simply allowed my mind to focus and dwell on other things, placing my hopes in people instead, trying to figure things out my own way...and all that comes down to 'seeking other false lovers' in my life.
The light went on when I came across this words; that my identity had something to do with 'simply' staying at home, abiding in Christ. I have to first make My heart His home for Him to dwell in.
'Resting in Jesus is not applying a spiritual formula to ourselves as a kind of fix-it.' It is the essence of being humble and letting our heart tells us where we are in our own story . We allow our mind to just simply listen to what our heart speaks.
In a given moment, we lay down our false self and the smaller story of whatever performance has sustained us, when we give up everything else but Him, we experience the freedom of knowing that He simply loves us where we are. We begin just to be, having our identity anchored in Him...
'When we begin to abide in God's heart, the blades of grass on heaven's outskits no longer puncture our feet.' ( Brent Curtis)
and once again,that same, still, gentle voice s p o k e into my weary soul, "It's OK..I know and I care..."
